what's next?

Dear God,
It's 10 after One, Monday.
There are so many things that are running through in my mind.
My head hurts at times, that is how extreme it can be.
complicated? no, if i was to compare with others' lives.
but then again, what's the point of comparing my story with others' ?
the question that I will ask myself when I'm faced with the downturn of my happy life is " Why did You allow all this, God? "
that's when my selfishness starts to come in and take over the wheel and I began to question even more.
sometimes, I want to give so badly, but I will learn to listen to His Voice and try to give it another try.
most of the time, in the end, things got worst.
I'm tired, God.
when I think it has all over, things are getting better yet it is happening again and again.
How long more anyway?
sometimes, all i ask for is just for people around me to be more understanding, is it to much to ask for?
Things on my mind:
- guilty towards sis.
- how to talk to bro.
- what's next, dad?
- why mom cares more about outsider.
- what's my plan after completing the last sem in poly.
- church stuff.
- things are falling apart with friends.
- work.


I am so tired of all the thinking.